Duo Plans To Play Every Venue In Providence In One Day
by Matt Obert
Vinyl Von Ricci and Sir VZO, the electronic duo known as Mahi Mahi, shocked the music world with their recent announcement of a seemingly impossible tour itinerary. On the first Saturday in April, the two men in white are going to attempt to play every venue in Providence.
“A lot of bands think that to really be successful, you have to tour the USA, tour Europe, go to Japan,” says Von Ricci. The musician reclines in his spacious office high above Turk’s Head Plaza, in a white leather and chrome chair designed by Mies van der Rohe for the 1929 World Exposition in Barcelona. His white suit, hand-tailored by Michael Kors, is immaculate. “I believe that you can achieve the same results by playing relentlessly in one city. I want to go deeper, not wider.”
He gestures at the gleaming burnished aluminum computer tower on his desk, the screen cluttered with driving directions, GPS data and relational database entries. “It’s going to be a lot of work, but we’re determined to pull it off.”
The tour kicks off at 9:00 a.m. at the Athenaeum on Benefit Street, followed at 9:15 by the Providence Art Club and at 9:30 by the University Club. A white limousine will bring the electronauts to the Rochambeau Branch of the Providence Public Library, then they’ll rock the brunch at Louis’ Diner, the Rue de l’Espoir, Brickway on Wickenden, and Olga’s Cup and Saucer—en route to the Temple to Music in Roger Williams Park, where they are scheduled to play at noon.
While in Roger Williams Park, they’ll play a set at the carousel, and another at the Museum of Natural History and Cormack Planetarium. The Planetarium’s staff has promised to smoke a big doobie, turn out the lights, and project an awesome sky display during the fifteen-minute set. Aw, yeah!
Later in the afternoon, the duo will cross the border into Edgewood to play the birthday party of 9-year-old Christine Darnielle of 45 Wheeler Avenue. “Edgewood is really in Cranston,” admits Von Ricci, “but Christine is a very special little girl.”
Von Ricci still hasn’t booked every stop on the tour, but he expects there will be very little downtime: “Basically, any place where you can fit two guys and a bunch of synthesizers, we’re playing there.”
In addition to established venues like Lupo’s, AS220, the Century Lounge, tazza, Xxodus Cafe at the Black Rep, and Giza, the men in white plan to perform in restaurants and bars—including the Decatur Lounge, Julian’s, Mediterraneo, Lili Marlene’s, the big hole in the ground next to Lili Marlene’s, the Green Bar, White Electric, the Red Room, Trinity Brew House, Talk Of The Town, Cuban Revolution, Muldowney’s, Nick-A-Nee’s, Nobody’s, Art Bar, a boat docked outside Fish Co., the glass elevator at the Biltmore, the coat room at Metropolis, Jerky’s, Jake’s, Deville’s, Kamp, Mirabar, the Eagle, Union Street Station, Wheels, Steam Alley (where Mahi Mahi plan to perform karaoke versions of their own songs), the Red Fez, the Wild Colonial and Reflections Cafe—plus art galleries and museums including Gallery Agniel, the RISD Museum, the Space at Alice, Gallery Z on Atwells, Bannister Gallery, Big Nazo Lab, the Russian Sub Museum, the Providence Children’s Museum, the Supine Feline and the Stairwell Gallery, among others.
On the East Side, they’ve already booked slots at the Brown Underground, Grad Center Bar, Orwig Music Library, Production Workshop (upstairs and downstairs), King House (Brown’s co-ed literary fraternity), the Zoo at the Hub, the Metcalf Refectory, the RISD Tap Room and Summer Camp on Steeple Street.
In the case of dearly departed venues such as the Safari Lounge, the Call, the Met Cafe, the Green Room at Snooker’s, One-Up, the Custom House and Mo’Joes, the duo intends to set up and play outside the building in a symbolic display of protest. It’s quite likely, though unconfirmed at press time, that the band will break in to the legendary Milhous co-op at the corner of Brook and Charlesfield. There are even plans to perform on the fire escape outside May ’n’ Kevin 4 Eva.
In the wee hours after bar time, Mahi Mahi plans to embark on a whirlwind tour of underground spaces including Firehouse 13, the Grow Room, the Dirt Palace, the Fancy Hut, the Lava Barn, Haven Bros., the Glass Nubbin, W.A.S.T.E., the Purple Crayon, Olneyville New York System, and the after-hours party at Therapy, among others.
The tour will finish with a very intimate command performance in your apartment. Mahi Mahi plans to batter down your door at 5:30 a.m. and set up their equipment in your bathroom. “We thought about playing in your bedroom,” explains Von Ricci, “but the acoustics are really quite incredible in the commode.”
This astonishing feat is only possible with the help of Mahi Mahi’s tireless ground crew of roadies. Under the leadership of Corleone Records’ Brian Oakley, they’ll rush to each venue ahead of the band to set up and sound check. Twelve identical sets of drums, synthesizers and lights were purchased to prepare for the twenty-one-hour hellride, and they’ll be shuttled from venue to venue in a fleet of identical white vans. The band members will ride in a long white stretch limo, chauffeured by Frank Difficult.
Major funding for the mammoth undertaking is provided by a grant from the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur foundation, who awarded $500,000 to Sir VZO for his tireless work in the field of cyborgasmics. It’s a well-kept secret that by day, Dr. Paul Servizio wears a white lab coat and works in a high-tech research lab—but then, he is the quiet one in the band.
Dr. Servizio explains that the band’s research in cyborgasmics was initially motivated by their desire to satisfy their sexually voracious younger girlfriends. “I’m going bald, and Vinyl has intimacy issues. Without cyborgasmics, we couldn’t possibly keep these girls around.”
A fledgling science, cyborgasmics picks up where its sister science, dildonics, left off in the last century. Cyborgasmic science aims to maximize pleasure by controlling the human nervous system via external electronic stimuli.
Dr. Servizio has discovered “certain electromagnetic frequencies—some in the visible spectrum, some audible, and many more in a bass range too low for human hearing to discern—which have been shown to induce violent, spasmodic muscular contractions.” Mahi Mahi’s live show is a natural outgrowth of this research; it’s a process of refining those frequencies so that they induce orgasms instead of twitchy dancing—thereby bringing about a state of world peace and post-coital bliss.
Sir VZO is characteristically humble on the topic of the MacArthur genius grant. “Of course, I’m happy to be awarded the Fellowship,” he demurs. “But personal wealth is not my particular ambition. This research is my ambition. Changing the world through cyborgasmics is my consuming passion. If this grant allows us to accelerate our research by playing all the venues in Providence in one 24-hour span of time, so be it. But if I hadn’t received the award, I’d have funded the work in some other way—perhaps by selling crack cocaine.”
This bold experiment reminds people that “orgasmic clarity” is not just found on a page in Glamour or Maxim. Orgasms are really the most universal human experience—unless you’ve never had one—and Mahi Mahi are going above and beyond the call of duty, “spreading the love” by leaving a warm, tingly afterglow in their music’s mattress-shaking wake.
Saturday, April 1 is your chance to follow Mahi Mahi on their grueling expedition. Alternatively, you could just hang out in one location all day, and wait for them to come to you.